1. |
want to feel
03:33
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I wanna feel beautiful. I wanna feel comfortable in my skin. But I'm not there yet, don't know if I'll ever be. I wanna feel pretty. I want you to look at me like him, but I can't have that until I can look at me too. Why's it so hard to be myself? Why's it so hard to be happy? I'm tired of wanting. I'm tired of needing. Why can't I just be happy with what I have? You don't feel beautiful. You don't wanna leave the house at all, but I still see it, even if you don't believe it. You don't feel pretty. You want me to look at you like that, but I always have, and I want you too, too. Why's it so hard to be ourselves? Why's it so hard to be happy? We're tired of wanting. We're tired of needing. Why can't we just be happy?
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2. |
human spit
02:34
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I want a stick of bamboo. I want a stick of bamboo, I'll shove it down your throat and out your ass. I want a pile of wood. I want a pile of wood, and a can of gasoline. I'll put it all together and I'll watch you burn. A human spit, my pound of flesh. You'll get what you deserve for what you did to me. I've got no regrets, 'cause I've got more hate than I know how to live with.
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3. |
use you
03:44
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If I had to guess why my life's a mess, I'd say I'm just depressed, but I know that's just a cop out. If I had to guess why I showed up late... I just needed to feel something other than hopeless. I'm afraid that I'll use you like I used to do. I'm afraid that I'll love you like I used to do.
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4. |
amy's song
03:25
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I've got to watch myself in this kind of situation. I'm stepping on marbles in this glass house, but I don't want you feeling sorry. Just be yourself, talk down your shit, and I'll try my best not to act like a dick. I slipped and fell, decided I'll never speak again. My mouth never got me anywhere. I can't defuse. The meltdown started in your room, spilled out to the hallway, and into the kitchen. I know there are knives there, I gotta fuckin' hide them. I slipped and fell, decided I'll never speak again. My mouth never got me anywhere. I made a fool of you and me and everyone else in here. My heart never got that smart. My brain never got that large. So I'll hide away and wait for things to change: I could never make an impact. But your presence is toxic, and I'm ready to live without the anger and the alcohol. I slipped and fell, decided I'll never speak again. My mouth never got me anywhere. I made a fool of you and me and everyone else in here. My mouth never got me anywhere. Man, I just gotta get outta here.
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5. |
facebook friends
03:38
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The nice thing about your friends getting married is it makes being alone look a lot less scary. The nice thing about your friends buying houses is you learn to love what you have. The nice thing about your friends getting dogs is now you got a reason not to get one. The nice thing about your friends having kids is it reminds you, you still have time. I don't need to compare myself to my friends in order to feel successful. I don't need to compare myself to the world to know where I ought-ta be, cause I know I ought-ta be here. The nice thing about your friends skippin' town is figuring out why the hell you haven't left too. The nice thing about finally movin' on is taking steps to feel alive. I don't need to compare myself to my friends in order to feel successful. I don't need to compare myself to the world to know where I ought'ta go, cause I know I'm always moving forward. Yeah, I know I'm never going back.
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6. |
real bummer wank
02:17
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have a sad cum
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7. |
sophie's song
02:09
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Well, lets talk about how I'm lonely most the time, and when I'm not I fuck things up and push my friends away. I'll never get better if I don't figure it out... So lets talk about how I'm an asshole most the time, and when I'm not I guess that I can be a decent guy. So I'll try to ignore all the things you do to provoke me when we talk about love, passion, and music... The things that really matter to me. It's not really fair to throw my fears in my face when we talk about how we aren't moving along. Well I really hate when you think you're right: you don't listen to what anyone has to say. And when we scream and shout, I can't help but feel that this is what its like to not be alone.
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8. |
closure
02:54
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I don't think that I could wake up if i felt much worse than this. If I had a reason to let it go, it'd probably add up to piss. Cause my bottles getting empty and I already miss the comfort of companion, compassion... Ignorant bliss. It's a shame that you've got this hold of me. Who's to blame when I didn't want to be set free?
This is probably all on me anyway.
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9. |
best intentions
03:24
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Sick of waiting for someone to tell me how to feel. Sick of seatching for slivers hoping for a better year. I'm young and full of shit. I'm bored and over it. Best intentions, never good enough. So I guess that there's no giving up cause something better is bound to come along someday but I'm dumb and losing grip. Yeah, I can not handle a relationship. Best intentions never good enough. I could never feel this anyway. I could never be this anyway. Expectations overblown and now I can finally see this for what it is: you used me and I used you, whats so fucking wrong with that? Was it that I held you and said your name? Was it that you made me believe I'll be okay? Well, I'll never be okay. So it wasn't all my fault? I'm not fucked up? At least, not that much, anyway... Is this the story that makes me whole? Am I alive yet?
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10. |
get gone
02:55
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I got something to say, never cared if you had listened anyway. But the way these last few years have gone, I know there's something better out there! But I just can't comprehend the universe outside my only home. If I took one step I'd fly away like dust. Man, I never really asked for much but my house falls away. I have no place to stay. I know it'll work out somehow... I hope it'll work out somehow. So we've come to the end: where my plans meet what I can not understand. The next few steps feel like they're something less than I had hoped for. What had I hoped for? So I'll pack up my car, cause if I don't get gone I know I never will. You always said there's something more. I'm ready to open life's last door cause the future is mine to decide. I'm like wildfire, I'll carve my own way through this. All these songs we sing, they'll never fade away. Even when I'm on my own out here, we'll never quite disappear.
When I go to sleep the back of my brain is in overdrive. Don't care how hard I try, I never find it safe in silence.
When I go to sleep the back of my brain is in overdrive.
But I don't have to listen.
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